Heat Shields
Need to remove your car radiator cap, but it's too hot?
That's not too hot for a hanky to handle (providing you fold it a couple of times).
If you can't wait for a blown light bulb to cool down, you can use your hanky to remove it. |  |
What do you do if you want to take your tasty pie out of the oven, but you've mislaid your oven glove?
Don't reach for your hanky, because that won't be thick enough (ovens, and the things you put into them, can get very hot).
You'll burn yourself.
But then you can use the hanky, either soaked in cold water or to hold ice cubes, to reduce the swelling.
| Important!
The use of a hanky to lessen the impact of heat can be quite common and useful.
However, it is important to bear in mind that the hotter the thing, the more folds will be required.
So if you are looking to handle something very hot, you will need a huge hanky to be able to fold it enough times.
Huge hankies are not very common.
In such instances I would NOT recommend the use of a hanky.
Mainly because I do not want to be meeting you in a court of law! |
Life of Crime
| Whilst I do not advocate any form of criminal activity, if you are legally deviant, or are contemplating being so, you may want to consider having a hanky as a partner in crime.
Seriously. |
Hankies can be used to hide your face, though this is a rather old form of disguise.
Nowadays a balaclava is more likely.
They are however still used to disguise the voice, particularly when on the telephone.
You can probably recall a film or television programme when one was used in such a way. |
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Finger-prints can be wiped away with a hanky.
If you are embarking on a premeditated crime, you may be better off using gloves (surgical ones are good, I've heard).
However, for spur-of-the-moment misdemeanours a hanky can be perfect. |
If you're into kidnapping a hanky can be used to gag your victim.
Or a blindfold so they don't know where you're taking them (a more enjoyable application for a blind fold can be found, below).
If you are not equipped with rope, or any other suitable material for binding, a hanky torn into strips can be a decent alternative.
And if you find you're not a very good criminal and you end up getting nicked, a hanky could be well useful for wiping the cell toilet before you shit.
War
I don't think hankies are standard issue for the British (or any other) Army, but they should be.
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Not only are they a make-shift dressing/bandage for most types of wound, but in the event of a gas attack they can be used to filter out harmful chemicals.
(I'm not sure how effective this would be, or for how long, but it has perhaps, maybe, got to be better than nothing!)
In World War 2 prisoners of war attempting escape used their hankys to draw maps on.
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And if things really are bad and the battle is not going according to plan, most hankies are white, and thus could serve as a surrender flag.
Yes, now we're onto a real juicy use!
Did you know that some people actually get their kicks from nearly suffocating themselves and each other during carnal pursuits?
It's true, and it even has a word; asphyxiophilia.
Technically, it is the intentional starvation of oxygen to the brain during sexual stimulation.
It's basically to do with your body increasing production of endorphins.
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There are many ways to achieve reduction of oxygen intake, including gagging yourself!
I bet that before you came to this site you never thought a hanky could give you or your partner a bigger boner.
Asphyxiophilia is unsurprisingly very dangerous, and it does result in many accidental deaths a year.
If you fall unconscious whilst gagging yourself, you may end up depriving yourself completely of oxygen.
And as most people know oxygen is quite important to living things.
Natural selection does work in some interesting ways! |
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For the less sexually adventurous (or less stupid), you can use your hanky as a blind fold, or perhaps use it to tie up your partner/s.
Deprivation of one sense often causes heightened stimulation in another.
And lastly, but just as important, and probably the most common use of a hanky in a sexual situation, it can be used for mopping up.
A hanky can solve the problem of "Who gets the wet patch?"
Or if playing alone, it can be used to 'contain your excitement'.
And remember, if there is a use for a handkerchief that you strongly feel should be mentioned here, please let us know. See:
Wanted
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